Standing Ovation

What is the deal with the standing ovation? I think that they should not be handed out willy nilly. I think that sometimes they are given away too freely, but maybe my criteria are just very different from other people's. I went to Berlin last night, part of Graeme Murphy's final season at the helm of Sydney Dance Company (did that sound like a press release or what?). I really enjoyed it but felt it was uneven in some ways; there were peaks and troughs. For me, to give a standing ovation, it should be impeccable and beyond technically perfect. There should be an extra "I don't know what", as the French would say if they spoke English. There were lots of great things about this show but it didn't move me. I will admit that I was very tired so maybe it was just me. But that brings me to another point - I'm not sure how I feel about the "mexican wave" standing ovation, where people stand up because the people around them have done so. If you think it is deserving of one then stand up. Don't stand up just becasue the person next to you thinks it is deserving of one.

But back to my thing about different criteria. Maybe last night they gave one because it was opening night (is there a separate protocol for this of which I am unaware?) and/or it is one of Murphy's final things with SDC. I personally don't think either of those things warrant a standing ovation, but perhaps to other people they do. Another awkward thing is that you need to think everything and everyone was amazing, because you can't half stand up, or have a neon sign over your head saying "This is for Johnny"... although I can see that catching on. So iOTA, if you read this, I would have given you a standing ovation, but I didn't have my neon sign handy.

Audience Celebrity Spots:
Tim Freedman
Paul Keating

Trends For Summer 07/08

I thought I'd share my ideas on directions in which I see the season going. since now is the time we should all be thinking about updating our wardrobes (not to mention political affiliations and beliefs, literary tastes and other things that should all be colour co-ordinated).

Paradigm Shifts:
Chai is the new Latte
Gluten Intolerance is the new Vegetarian
Atheist is the new Mormon
Chrones is the new Chronic Fatigue

What's So Hot Right Now?:
Throws for the couch
Burma
Stories featuring Oprah's new gardening guru (Jamie Durie) and his sexy, secret, shameful, seedy past as a stripper
Making Emos Cry (that way everyone is happy)


Trends For the Future (2009 and beyond)
Blogs about tea
Thai Fisherman's hats, gloves and shoes
"Scientology is the new Black"
Austrlian Idol contestants' Greatest Hits compilations

I know that much of this is pretty profound stuff, so please feel free to make buttons, t shirts etc featuring any of these as slogans. I will not charge for copyright. Now go forth and be fashionable.

The Hills Are Dead With The Sound of Music

What makes a film a musical? What makes a film a dance film? These and other exciting questions are being shouted at me from the windows of W6A (the world's second ugliest building*, and home to our questionably illustrious department) by DCMS staff and acolytes every time I cross the car park to enter.
...Ok, maybe I have a little cabin fever, and this is the result of a slightly crazed imagination. In reality, it's only one or two people doing the shouting. So, with all the carry on, I am thinking about this a lot and believe I have come up with the definitvie answer to the second one at least. Here it is: A dance film usually contains plot that is centerd around dance, and also some actual dancing. The most important element, however is that someone dies or is already dead. Let's look at some examples:
Save The Last Dance - mother dies
Flashdance - Hannah the mentor dies
The Red Shoes - dances herself to death
Bootmen - dead mother, AND the brother dies
Billy Elliot - dead mother
All That Jazz - protagonist dies
Dancer in the Dark - single mother who basically dies (but this is Arty, so can't be expected to follow the rules exactly. It needs to be Clever and Thought Provoking)

Does this work for musicals?
Sound of Music - dead mother
West Side Story - Tony dies
Moulin Rouge - Satine dies
Wizard of Oz -TWO witches die (plus Dorothy is an orphan)
Once - dead mother
Oliver - I can't remember this very well because I saw a school production and had to block a lot of it out (no offense Koala) but I have brought in a outside expert to help me with this list and he assures me that Nancy dies.
South Pacific - someone with a dumb name dies

....so I think we get the point

There are loads more but the list is getting boring. One final comment is that lots of Disney movies like The Lion King also follow this theme.

I think this is pretty strong evidence. The End. By Sophie

*it's pretty well documented that the world's ugliest building is the one I currently live in. I personally don't agree with this, but then, I don't have to look at it because I am inside it.

Shitney Spears and Not OK-Fed

Well, it's not so much those two that I want to rant about, as the terrible excuses for English you come across when you read comments posted by people on a Britters/K-Fed article. Lack of punctuation aside, I have a few problems with this one:


They are both trash and the kids belong with someone decent that can raise them to be good upstanding citizens. They are screwed up human beings if one would call them that*. These celebrities if that is what you call them# deserve far less if any media attention. The important issues in this country seemed to have far less if any priority than this garbage you keep reporting on^. Give Us a break

*You just did
#well it's what you just called them.
^But you still read it - didn't you?

Sigh.

I Would Like To Be Gentially Superior

The problem with third years is that they have usually learnt to self-edit, and don't write such funny things in their essays. I have been doing a bit of marking and it's really not as fun as it could be. Last semester, the best one I read was this: "These people are genitally superior". I'm still not sure what the student actually meant, because even "genetically superior" didn't make sense in the context.


In other news, the sun is shining, people are sailing boats outside my window etc blah blah blah... just a typical Sydney day. I'm not bored with sunshine precisely, but I think it is a little overused, kind of how I feel about that hyper-real, we-must-talk-to-one-another-quickly-and-while-wearing-black-overcoats-in-order-to-catch-the-perp aesthetic of crime shows on TV. I didn't demand it, but I am happy enough to engage with it for a while, even though it's always the same old same old.

The Bitter, Twisted, Secret History Of Me

"When I began yelling obscenities at the characters in boring ads on TV, I realised that I was at the wrong end of the gin glass, and had become bitter and twisted."

I wrote that a few days ago and since I was at the bottom of the gin glass when I did, I never bothered to finish it off. Lately I have managed to keep the obscenities to a minimum, and mostly confined to characters on TV shows rather than ads. I think I have shown remarkable restraint. There are some terrible ads out there.

But onto other matters: of what has my life consisted recently? Three things mainly, which are 1. my thesis chapter draft, 2. The Secret History (Donna Tartt) and 3. Australian Idol.

1. The less said the better, but I submitted it this morning.

2. This book is gripping, disturbing, well written and very long. I am close to the end but have had to set it aside for a while because it is getting under my skin, and making me want to emulate the main characters which would entail the study of ancient Greek, being slightly drunk all day long and murdering my annoying but somewhat endearing classmate named Bunny.

3. I have a deep and abiding intense dislike (I was going to write hate, but that is quite a strong word, best reserved for extreme cases) of Carl The-Judges-And-I-Think-I-Am-The-Next-Michael-Buble-So-We-Collectively-Ignore-My-Inability-To-Sing-In-Tune-And-General-Lack-Of-Musicality Risely. I mean really, that scatting is completely dire. I think my 65 year old neighbour Shirley could put more swing and conviction into it. And the fact that he puts it in every song no matter what it is shows that he is a man of very little brain, and can only handle one idea at a time.

I'll try to save my Idol rants to one person per post, in the hope that by spreading it out I will look less bitter and unable to manage my anger.

Liquid Lunch For Me Thanks Mrs M.

Yes that's right folks - I actually had a liquid lunch yesterday. A gin and tonic to be exact.
It was all down to a hideous shift at the bookshop. (There are only two things that drive me to drink, the other one is my thesis...ok, also mumble pants*, so that makes three, oh and I guess turquoise coloured skinny jeans on pimply 'yooouths', Bindy Irwin...)
Anyhoon, to be fair and precise, I should explain that as my shift started at 12 I ate before that so my 'lunch break' was at about 3.30 and I wasn't really hungry. But I really needed that drink.

* For those who may be unfamiliar with the term, mumble pants are very tight leggings. Why are they called mumble pants? Because you can see the lips moving but you can't hear what they are saying.