Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Why Is Everything So Hard?

Ok, there is a lot of really shitty frustrating stuff in my life right now, but I have realised that there isreally only one thing that needs to happen which will fix almost everything:

Breed square pigs.

I was making a ham sandwich the other day, and my piece of ham came in a big, double smoked, fatty circle of meat. My bread was square. The two shapes did not fit and I wasted precious seconds (that could have been used more efficiently, like by coming up with a cure for cancer or something) folding and ripping the ham to fit on the bread. If the ham came in a square shape to begin with I would have produced a delightful sandwich AND discovered the cure for cancer and the reason this didn't happen is all the fault of the lazy, dullard pig farmers who need to get their shit together.


Juice Bar said...

3 words: Pig Shaped Bread.

Anonymous said...

3 words: You Two Rock.