I have started reading the slush pile at work. Here is my response to the woman who submitted a reworked fairytale in the guise of a 'rap'. She followed up the original deathly silent non-response to her submission by resubmitting 'Rap on Cindy'* along with five more 'raps' and a comment stating that she "had no luck with the suggested submission process" so was just going to projectile email the poor receptionist her shit instead.
Dear Monica,
I am not surprised you had no luck with the suggested submission process.
Your work is derivative, culturally insensitive, and completely lacking in literary or commercial value.
If you can managed to fix these issues I am sure you have a bright future as a successful published author. Keep trying!
Kind Regards, etc ...
*It is exactly as bad as you can imagine from the title.
1 comment:
lol, you tell 'em
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