Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

I'm going to make a bold statement here, but I think the reason Johnny Depp grew that ridiculous moustache and long hair was because he got sick of being mistaken for k. d. lang. You might think they don't really look much like one another, and I agree with you but the thing you've got to remember is that there are quite a lot of incredibly stupid people in the world.

For example, the number of people who want to buy or look at the book "Eat, Pray, Love" and can't manage to get the three words of the title in the correct order outnumbers the people who can by about 550 bazillion percent. It's an even worse statistic than the number of people who think Tony Abbott and Peter Costello used to be a comendy duo from Hollywood's Golden Era.

Also, scientists are very stupid when it comes to inventing things that would make my life easier and better. I am still waiting on square pigs, see-through wine casks with level markers up the side, and a couch that feels like someone is hugging you with optional mock-hand back-stroking appendage (for those lonely Winter nights)... I am far too busy coming up with the ideas to work on the details. Also, I am quite busy drinking beverages and watching Project Runway and having to walk the long way around to get home so I can avoid the stairs.

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