I have a nemesis.
Although I don't particularly like him (that sort of being the point with nemeses), I do rather like that fact that I have one.
Why is he my nemesis?
Because he is my antagonistic opposite - in some ways we are similar and in others we are totally different. We started our PhDs at the same time, but the big difference there is that he had a scholarship and I did not. Although I had less money than him, he complained about being poor and I did not (Well, ok, I did complain, but whatever. Not as much as he did). The point is, he is annoying. But in a rather funny way, which I will now demonstrate with this little story.
Nemesis was in a band, and was telling me in the postgrad room one day how he had been recently ejected from the band. He was quite pissed off. What he found most galling was the fact that he had only ever joined the band to begin with as a favour to his friend. This apparently meant that his level of commitment needn't be as high as the other members, because they were lucky to have him!
I asked Nemesis what reason they had given for kicking him out, and he said that one of the complaints the band members had was that he arrived late and left early to rehearsals. This is something that would probably really annoy me if I were in a band, so at this point in the conversation I said something thoughtful yet noncommittal like "Oh" . Nemesis, however, had a water tight reason for this behaviour: "I live the furtherest away! That's why I leave early"... Like it was the most obvious thing in the world...
I really didn't know what to add at this point, so we turned back to our computers, but Nemesis was thinking of other things, because a moment later, he turned to me and said, in a thoughtful tone "You know something? That is actually the fourth dysfunctional band that I have been kicked out of." Wow, fancy that.